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Ruminations and Reflections

Christian Kelly

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Jellybeans

I like music festivals. There's a vibe at these things you experience nowhere else. A sense of community, like old friends coming together. Social norms are suspended and people actually talk to each other. Not small talk, like the weather or how the Seahawks are doing this year; but smiling ear to ear right in your face, free hugs and all. Standard introductions are set aside because those are for strangers and here, you're not a stranger; even if it's your first time at the festival.

One of my very favorite festivals is the Northwest String Summit. It's a bluegrass festival in what is essentially Hillsboro Oregon. I wait all year for this thing; it's my Christmas. The first year I took my wife we found a pretty good campsite in what they call "Turtle Camp." (See, this is a bluegrass hippie festival and hippies have names for everything.) I liked Turtle as that's where the musicians would hang out and have open jam sessions. You grab your guitar and walk around until you hear a group jamming. Most are open to newcomers, but some are bands warming up so you do hafta ask nicely... You never knbow who you might wind up playing with.

Anyway... the first year my wife and I went together we were sitting in our camp doing something... I don't remember what, when this guy walks by on the path, stops and asks me if I know Crazy Legs Bob. I reply that I do not and he introduces himself as Taco Tim (hippies have noame for everything and everyone!). He walks up into our campsite and excitedly pointing around he starts naming stuff... "Look! A guitar, a bong, Jellybeans!" He turns and looks at me and says "You need to write a song about that" and turning to leave said over his shoulder "I'll be back later to see how you did."

I looked at my wife and thought - why not? So I wrote what turned out to be Jellybeans.

Oh, and my hippie name is Dr Skippy McNibbles - I got it because I make awesome pot chocolate. Like an old west travelling medicine show...

“When I was 5 years old, my mother always told me that happiness was the key to life. When I went to school, they asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up. I wrote down ‘happy’. They told me I didn’t understand the assignment, and I told them they didn’t understand life.” - John Lennon

Best Damn Woman

I had several relationships before I found my wife. Like everyone. One relationship I had was bad.

OK, more than one, but we're talking about Best Damn Woman so...

I was in love. I would have done anything for her. But she beat me.

Why is it that when a woman hits a man it's funny? People laugh at men when we get hit by women. And what are we supposed to do? We can't hit back... Stand there and take it is what I did. There's a emotion of self disgust and loathing when you stand there and let the person you love wail on you. You start to think maybe you deserve it. Especially when people just point and laugh.

So I wrote a song about her. About the conflict between my love for her, and how it made me feel about myself.

She was NOT a good woman.

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